I probably shouldn't be writing about this, I feel guilty doing so, but I have to share it with someone. So it may as well be with you JU. Where I can remain faceless, and nameless. I think my sister is insane. I don't say this lightly either. I think she is a nutter. She has always been guilty of strange behaviour. Always. She has this paranoia that the world is out to get her. She also has a face you want to slap. Do you ever see them people walking down the street that have a certain way about them, a certain look, and you can't help but just look at them for that bit longer, or wonder why they choose to carry that huge chip on their shoulder. Well that is my darling sister, that if anyone so much as looks at her in the wrong way, she is ready for war with them. I've never understood this about her, because she complains about it all the time, yet she chooses to embrace it at every opportunity she gets. Anyway enough of that, she is insane. Now as some of you may know, relations between me and my sister haven't been to good, and we haven't really mixed that much recently. Today I was forced to spend time with her. Well it wasn't even really spending time with her. I had to listen to her and my Mum talk. I should really record it and make a comedy show out of it, because it is hilarious. I didn't know people have conversations like this, but obviously insanity is breeding in my family.
My sister is a little slow. She takes everything literally, so them witty sarcastic comments fly straight over her head, and she is none the wiser. Now if I was more evil, and on speaking terms with her I could take advantage of this. Fortunatly for her, I'm nice (sometimes) and we aren't talking. Listening to her and my Mum was just painful though. I pretended to be reading a book so I wouldn't be drawn into their ridiculous conversation. My sister came in all aggitated and my Mum asked her what was wrong. My sister informs my Mum, that she is just to nice. Now I had to try not to laugh at this. My Mum asked her to explain further. Apparently my adorable sister is just to good looking, and men throw themselves at her night and day, and she just can't handle it. My Mum in her usual blunt manner told my sister not to be stupid. At this point my sister got all excited and said this is what happens to young single girls. Men throw themselves at you. I was going to argue that part, but you can't reason with my sister, so I let her continue.
Next my sister explained to my Mum about her new found fear of water. That running water makes her nervous, and she just can't deal with it. I was going to say, I thought I could smell something, but I actually thought this one could be a serious issue, so again I hid behind my book. My Mum, who I can always rely on to get to the bottom of things, questioned her about this too. I still don't fully understand it, but I don't think I'm supposed to. If the water is running, my sister won't be able to hear if someone is coming to get her. Were as if it's not, she will be able to hear it. My Mum asked why anyone would want to get her, and that just lead us back to the single young girl theory. Apparently there is reason to her madness.
Now comes the best bit. This is the part I feel a little guilty for sharing but what the heck. My sister went to go to the toilet, but unfortunately she didn't make it, and umm...wet herself. This isn't the first time she's done this. She went away with my sister not long ago, on a plane. My sister remained very quiet towards the end of the journey, and she was sat on her jumper. When getting off the plane my sister told her she had left her jumper behind and went to get it for her. My sister got all weird and made a big thing about leaving the jumper. Later she informed my sister she had, had a pee in the seat...because....she couldn't be bothered to get up to go! This is not the behaviour of a sane person. I told her this when I was brave enough to poke my head up from behind my book. She agreed. At least that is something. She's a nice girl, with a fear of water, who wets herself....what man wouldn't want that?