Whilst listening to the radio a while ago, a lady phoned in and said she had discovered her boyfriend was cheating on her, and had kicked him out. Nothing really odd there is there. I mean people cheat everyday. We know it's so easy to do, and love and trust doesn't seem to weigh very highly when it comes to todays couple. However, this ladies story got stranger. Her boyfriend went off to the pub with his friends, and she went to do some work on the pc they shared. She discovered his archive of messages from MSN and proceeded to read them. There she discovered messages between him and a mystery lady. Rude messages. Messages of a sexual nature. Now this man had never met this lady, and it was strictly an internet thing. She didn't even think they had any intentions of meeting. Yet she classed this as cheating. Phoned him up at the pub where he was with his friends, and immediately finished with him.
Now the debate on the radio started. Does that count as cheating? Well it depends on the person doesn't it. If this man was getting close to someone, and forming an emotional bond with someone that is not his girlfriend, I can understand the partner being upset, but can it be classed as cheating? Or is it only cheating once there has being physical contact? Technically I don't consider it to be cheating. However, if I had a partner that I found was doing that, I would consider there to be something wrong with the relationship, and try to work it out so he didn't have to do that, or finish the relationship. She also broke his trust by reading his messages, even though she found something, that doesn't make it okay for her breaking his trust.
It's difficult with internet friendships, or whatever you decide to class them as. Because you are a faceless person at one end of a phoneline. You could be anyone, and you can pretend to be anyone. You can also tell your deepest darkest secrets, and still remain faceless. There is something easier about telling a stranger personal things, because they can't judge you. They don't really matter to you, so you can gain insight without really caring about their opinion. So this has to be considered when wondering if that kind of emotional bond is cheating.
I think I would have reacted in a similar way to this girl. Though I think discussing it is the key. At least this guy isn't out somewhere getting it off with some girl. Or maybe in fact it is worse that he is actually talking to someone, and telling them private things. Building a bond with them. It's a difficult question. Did she do the right things? Is forming an emotional bond with someone worse than physically cheating?