Drugs are bad...that's all I have to say

*RANT ALERT*

Published on July 11, 2004 By Sally jacobs In Home & Family

I haven't wrote an article for ages where I just tell you what's going on with me, probably because them article are rather boring, but we shall call it a catch up. Things aren't to good at the moment, I think that's why I've probably stopped doing these personal blogs, but maybe if I get these rants out of the way, then somehow I will feel soothed. I'm sat here, finally recovered (almost, It's not catching anymore at least!) from the awful chicken pox. I haven't seen my niece in like a week in fear of her catching it, today is the first time in seeing her, and all hell has broken loose. Some things I don't share in my blog, I kind of like to keep them separate, but today I will share a small part with you, because I feel if I don't get some of this out I'm going to explode. My sister, to say I hate her would be to strong, and would give her far more power over me than I'd ever want her to have. I love her, I always will she is my sister, but I don't like her and I don't hide the fact i don't like her. Evil, I know. My sister is a drug addict. Drugs control her life, she lives for them, everyday she gets up and the one thing on her mind is where she can get her next hit from. This isn't a problem that has just come about, she has been a drug addict for over ten years, and I don't see it stoping anytime soon.

When I was small I looked up to her, I ignored my other sister thinking her goody two shoes ways were just to boring. I idolised my eldest sister, everything she did in my opinion was great. I watched my Mum cry over her, wondering where she was at night, I've seen her beat my Mum up, just when she's on a come down and she has no one else to lash out to. She's stole from us, she's terroized people for no reason. She herself has been terroized. Drug dealers are not very nice people. They get you hooked and then watch you suffer and profit from that suffering. We are not a poor family, I would say middle-class, me and my sisters have never gone without. My sister had a good job, something I may discuss in another blog, but she had a very good job, that paid her very good money. It wasn't enough though, she had a drug problem that cost her over a grand a week, that is ALOT of drugs, and when she didn't have the money she still wanted the drugs. It lead to some pretty nasty situations that I won't go into, but she was pretty much bailed out on every occasion.

I know I sound evil and she's my sister and I should do whatever to make sure she is ok, but you reach a point where enough is enough. She's lied, stole, cheated been abusive and sister or not there is a point you reach where enough is enough. My family doesn't share my thoughts, they bend over backwards for her, I've pretty much cut her out of my life, I'm not willing to help someone who isn't willing to help themselves. I'm not willing to watch the rest of my family suffer pain and misery at her hands. It's already caused problems between me and my other sister, and my Mum and Dad, it's just sad, and it hurts, and i don't see an end to it. I'm sat here watching Maddy sleep, oblivious to it all, she's truely beautiful, and whatever happens, i won't let her be hurt by all this.

My sister has been on drugs for so long that it's changed her mentally, she isn't the same person, she is violent. and nasty and self obsessed. She is awful to random people, we get a phone call today saying she has been arrested, and that's why I'm now left with Maddy and the rest of the family have gone running to her aid, she calls, we drop everything, nothing ever changes, if it was up to me I would let her rot, teach her a lesson. She can't threaten people, she can't live the life she does with no consequences, the fact she always gets bailed out, just means she carries on doing it, and it really makes me mad!

On other ranting topics, Kermit. I'm talking to him as I write this. He isn't the same anymore, I want him to comfort me, to be caring again, and he's not. He's distant and uninterested, and I'm just going on and on, ranting about this topic, while he is busy trying to distance himself from me. Maybe I have to much going on at the moment i don't know but I just really like him and he makes me happy and even that is going down the toilet,

!

Anything else I can rant about, not at the moment I don't think, I'm sorry, I'll probably come back and delete this article, i just needed to get it all out, and I have, it's not really made me feel better though!

Comments (Page 2)

Kayles

on Jul 13, 2004

I hate drugs! There were many reasons I got divorced, but that was one of the main ones! I hate them, hate them, hate them!

Sally jacobs

on Jul 13, 2004

It wasn't until I was shown a bit of tough love and not given any financial assistance whatsoever that I started to find my way out of the problem, see the error of my ways and seek help when I needed it.

I think that is the action needed, I really do, it may sound harsh but until she starts doing things for herself there is no hope!

You, your sis and the rest of your family will be in my prayers tonight. I hope it all pans out for the best soon

You're very kind, thankyou, and thanks for sharing your experiences, it can't have been easy.

hate drugs! There were many reasons I got divorced, but that was one of the main ones! I hate them, hate them, hate them!

Totally agreed, couldn't have put it better myself

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