"Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood."
and with dirty old men!
Published on June 18, 2004 By Sally jacobs In Travel
Prepare yourselves, I'm in a slightly hyperactive stae, so what I write may make little to no sense! I am VERY dizzy, I am forever walking into things, falling over, and generally doing stupid things. I think it's because I walk around with my head in the clouds most of the time, and pay little attention to what's going on in the world around me, now this is all well and good. Though it's left me with a huge fear of learning to drive, I just think that my attention will wander and I'll end up in some huge crash and that will be the end of Sally! Plus, I can barely walk without causing damage to myself, so what hope do I have behind the wheel of a powerful car, little to none! So it looks like i will have to stick with public transport. Which I have a very odd relationship with, I love it and hate it.

I used to work about an hour away from my house, so I had to do this very long bus journey twice a day, I loved sitting and observing the people that got on and off the bus, it would appear that it's mostly social misfits like myself who use public transport. Plus it gave me good thinking time. I love my thinking time, I do it when I'm walking, escape into a little world inside my head, it's a wonder I haven't being run over really! For all these good times, lol, good times? Anyway for all these good things I enjoy about buses, there are the bad to. I think I've mentioned before that weird people are just drawn to me, I don't know why, they obviously see me as one of their own, but they just really like me! There was this woman, on a packed bus, I mean it was full to breaking point, and this woman was huge, i don't know how that is exactly relevant but she was a scary figure, and she just started talking to herself. I don't actually have a problem with people talking to themselves, I am guilty of it myself, yes I'm that weird person you see walking down the street, talking away to themselves, but this woman, got so aggressive, she started screaming and shouting, and all the people on the bus were looking everywhere but at her. She was stood directly in front of me, and as I mentioned she was a big lass, and I'm tiny, and all I kept thinking was she's going to end up on my knee, and squash me to death, nooooooooooo! Hehe, I did feel for her though, there was something obviously not right with her, she even started talking to me at one point *scared*

Now I've had lots of bad experiences with men on buses, I don't know why, but they see it as the perfect opportunity to try and chat you up. They must think, oooh she can't escape, she can't run away like they usually do, so now is my perfect opportunity! Grrr....the experience that springs to mind wasn't so nice though, it was another day where the bus was packed, and it was a summers day, nice and warm and I was wearing a nice little skirt, in hope the sun would remember I did have legs, and grace them with a tan! So this old guy, I say old, he was like in his 50's, and through lack of spaces he ended up sitting next to me. He looked like a business man, he had a suit and tie on and a brief case. He sat the briefcase on his knee, holding it either side, so his hand was touching my leg. I didn't really think anything of it, as they are pretty confined spaces, so I just carried on in my own little world gazing out of the window, sending a silent prayer to the sun. Then I felt his hand moving up and down my leg, still i was thinking, it's the bus jerking, it's nothing, surely he wouldn't be so blatant? He ended up with his hand just firmly on my thigh, grrrrr! Now at that point I wasn't happy, so I muttered to myself about dirty old men, moved my leg away from him, accidently kicking him as I did, and carried on looking out of the window. It wasn't even as though it would be easy to move, because everyone was all squashed up. He kept doing it though, rubbing his hand on my thigh, and I'd move, he'd stop, and then it would all start up again. I generally speak my mind, and this occasion was goint to be no different, I stood up, called him a dirty old git, and pushed passed him, I ended up having to stand up, with the whole bus looking at me like I was insane, but people always do that, so nothing new there! Imagine if the girl was a bit more shy than me though, and just didn't know what to do, it really isn't right!

So that's me and public transport, people really make me laugh, the way they hate for people to sit next to them, we can be so socially retarded! You can see people thinking please don't come and sit next to me, or when they do sit next to you, you try and not touch each other, what is that about! Some people want to make polite conversation, and you see the person they are sat next to looking out of the window, and refusuing to look at them, like little old ladies, I quite like their company, they make me laugh. As much as we wait people sitting next to us, if a spare seat appears and they move to it, we wonder what's wrong with us? Hehe, will we ever understand human nature?

Comments
on Jun 18, 2004
I catch public transport ever day to and from work. I have noticed that, in the morning, the seat next to me is the last one to be taken, but on the way home people don't seem to care....maybe it's my f... you attitude in the mornings (a psychopathic killer on his way to work) as opposed to my more benign attitude in the evenings ( peace to all men.)
on Jun 18, 2004
I'm the same as Gerry - no one sits next to me on buses! I don't know why, and I used to get a complex about it, but reading your tale, I think I am glad! i used to wonder if I smelled!
Poor you - damn perverts. Should have kicked him in the nuts!
on Jun 18, 2004
Thank goodness I have never had to use public transport, I have heard some terrible tales. It is wonderful to be wealthy, I am driven everywhere. I pity the peasants, sitting on their filthy seats, watching wealthier people travel to their higher paid and more rewarding jobs.

I can barely walk without causing damage to myself, so what hope do I have behind the wheel of a powerful car,


Don't worry Sally, I am told they have provisions to keep people like you off the roads even if they wanted to drive! I also doubt that you would be able to afford a "powerful car" so there is no need to worry about driving one.
on Jun 18, 2004
it's my f... you attitude in the mornings (a psychopathic killer on his way to work) as opposed to my more benign attitude in the evenings ( peace to all men.)


...I've noticed that if I don't like the look of someone, I pull my unfriendly face, and they get scared off hehe!

Poor you - damn perverts. Should have kicked him in the nuts!


I would have if there had been more leg room, lol!

Thank goodness I have never had to use public transport


You're very lucky Petey, I wouldn't recommend it! I don't think I'll ever learn to drive !
on Jun 18, 2004
Good post Sally I know exactly what you mean except I always seem to get sat next to HUGE HAIRY peeps with no de-oderant or old ladies that never stop talking. AAAAAAARRRRGH. Have you ever heard the song "national express" by the divine comedy? From the sounds of your post I think you would like it! Its a send-up of public transport. If you want a copy drop me a line Tkaczyk5@AOL.com and I'll e-mail it to you
on Jun 18, 2004

I just love the people with flatulence on crowded buses or trains.  It's bad enough that I have to smell your halitosis and BO, but your farts too? 


 

on Jun 18, 2004
glad I ride a cycle...
on Jun 19, 2004
I always seem to get sat next to HUGE HAIRY peeps with no de-oderant


...there the folks that try and sit on my knee! Thanks for the offer, I'll defo e-mail you!

I just love the people with flatulence on crowded buses or trains. It's bad enough that I have to smell your halitosis and BO, but your farts too?


Ewwwwww, I can't stand the stinkies!

glad I ride a cycle...


Ha! You have the right idea, keep fit and avoid the weirdos!

on Jun 20, 2004
i sat on the number 7 train in manhattan once, opposite a guy enthusiastically picking his nose.

let's just say the whole time i hoped he wasn't enjoying it enough to go flicking it off his fingers to wherevah!

on Jun 20, 2004
i sat on the number 7 train in manhattan once, opposite a guy enthusiastically picking his nose.


I've seen a guy do that, and I had to fight the urges to go and smack him across the head and tell him to have some manners, ha, I'm turning into my Mum!